Friday, October 30, 2015

BOND MONTH: Ranking the Bond Actors


To close out Rhode Island Movie Corner’s second annual Bond Month, one week before the stateside release of ‘Spectre’ on November 6th, I will be doing what could arguably be one of the most important lists ever when it comes to talking about the James Bond franchise; ranking the 6 actors who have played James Bond to date. For the record, that doesn’t count David Niven, who played Bond in the 1967 comedy ‘Casino Royale’. Only those who starred in an ‘official’ Bond film for Eon Productions.

006 George Lazenby


Well I guess it’s the obvious choice to start off a list ranking all 6 Bond actors with the one Bond lead who literally only starred in 1 Bond film, ‘On Her Majesty’s Secret Service’, before immediately stepping down from the role, resulting in his predecessor returning for one more ‘official’ Bond film. But for the record, it’s primarily because of this fact that he’s at the low point on this list, not due to his performance as Bond as most people like to focus on. There have been a lot of people who have accused him of being wooden in his performance and while I do see where they’re coming from, I view this as a result of Lazenby apparently never really having a chance to shine in the role because he was stuck in Sean Connery’s shadow, something that would affect Roger Moore early on in his Bond career as well. In fact, every other Bond actor’s best performance usually came in one of their later films so I feel that Lazenby could’ve fared much better had he had more time as Bond. And say what you will about his performance, but his scene where he talks to the police officer after Tracy’s death was where he was at his best. But ultimately, that would be it for George Lazenby, the one Bond that most people tend to forget, even though he was the star of one of the best Bond films of all-time.

005 Timothy Dalton


Like Lazenby, Timothy Dalton’s career as Bond was very short. He did star in more Bond films than Lazenby, but only by one more. His second film, ‘Licence to Kill’, was one of the franchise’s biggest under-performers and this subsequently led to a legal dispute over the rights to the franchise. By the time the series returned with ‘GoldenEye’, Dalton had already stepped down from the role, which is a shame because, contrary to popular opinion, I think that he was actually a really solid Bond. He was the predecessor to Daniel Craig in terms of portraying a much more serious and emotionally driven Bond. Plus, he absolutely looked the part, perhaps even more so than any other Bond lead before or after him. But ultimately his biggest downfall while in the role was that he wasn’t as strong as Roger Moore when it came to spewing Bond’s trademark quips. I wouldn’t go as far to say that he was ‘absolutely terrible’ at humor, but because he played the role so seriously, there wasn’t as many opportunities for one-liners. Still, I think he did a phenomenal job as Bond and I’d argue that ‘Licence to Kill’ is not only his best Bond film, but also the series’ most underrated film to date.

004 Roger Moore


Sean Connery and Roger Moore are arguably the two most iconic Bonds of all-time. But when it came to Moore’s tenure as 007, he had a bit of a mixed run in terms of both performances and the films that he starred in. Early on in his run, the filmmakers tried to make him like Sean Connery’s Bond when really that was the wrong route to go, which was most evident in ‘The Man with the Golden Gun’ (e.g. the scene where he twists Andrea Anders’ arm in order to get information from her) and ‘For Your Eyes Only’, which opted to take a much more serious route compared to its far campier predecessor ‘Moonraker’. Moore wasn’t the tougher Bond like Connery was that was similar to Ian Fleming’s original interpretation. He was much more charismatic and was also a master when it came to Bond’s hilarious quips. So ultimately, his best performances as Bond came in films like ‘The Spy Who Loved Me’, ‘Moonraker’, and ‘Octopussy’, where he was simply allowed to be himself. However, he was also in the role longer than he needed to be. By the time he started filming his final Bond film, ‘A View to a Kill’, he was 57 years old and was even older than his leading lady’s mother. By that point, he was no longer convincing in the role so it’s a good thing that ‘A View to a Kill’ ended up being the last time Moore would take on the role of Bond. It’s a shame though that he had to end his career with what is, in my opinion, the worst Bond film in the series to date.

003 Sean Connery


What more can be said about Sean Connery as James Bond? He was the one who started it all and is arguably the one actor that is the most identified with the character. So why then is he only ranked at #3 on this list? Well ultimately this just comes to down to personal preference as I just like the next two actors more in the role of Bond. It may have something to do with the fact that these next two actors were the Bonds of my time but that doesn’t mean that I don’t like Connery in the role of Bond. He definitely had the right amount of swagger and charisma for the role and was also able to throw in a good quip from time to time. But at the same time, he also wasn’t afraid to take on some of the darker elements of the character. As far as his films are concerned, he started off his career as Bond with a bang with three back-to-back classics in ‘Dr. No’, ‘From Russia with Love’, and ‘Goldfinger’. However after that, his Bond films started to decline in terms of quality. Part of it can stem from the fact that it seemed like Connery was getting bored in the role which is most noticeable in ‘Thunderball’ and especially in ‘You Only Live Twice’. He retired from the role after ‘You Only Live Twice’ but returned two films later for ‘Diamonds are Forever’. But while he was definitely much more enthusiastic in the role this time around, the film ended up being the weakest of the Bond films that he did for Eon. After that film, he finally stepped away from the Eon franchise for good… and then reprised the role of Bond one more time in the unofficial Bond film/remake of ‘Thunderball’, ‘Never Say Never Again’, released in 1983, the same year as ‘Octopussy’.

002 Daniel Craig


As we all know, when Daniel Craig was first cast as 007, a lot of fans weren’t too pleased with this decision. Feeling that Craig simply wasn’t fit for the role of Bond, they responded with the kind of vitriol that you tend to see from comic book fans whenever someone is cast in the lead role of a superhero film. But Craig thankfully managed to prove most of his critics wrong with ‘Casino Royale’, in which he proved to be one of the finest to have ever taken on the role of Bond. The film marked a new era for the Bond franchise as it moved away from the over-the-top plots and gadgets in favor of a stripped down, grittier interpretation of the character and Craig more than fit the part. He carries a cold and edgy demeanor but also has an emotional vulnerability to him as well. ‘Quantum of Solace’ may have been a rather disappointing follow-up to ‘Casino Royale’, but Craig still shined as Bond. And then came ‘Skyfall’, which once again redefined the character of Bond. Now Bond had to deal with the possibility of being ‘past his prime’ in an age where people like Q are much more effective behind a computer than he is out in the field. As I stated earlier, usually a Bond lead actor’s best performance comes in one of their later films and that is definitely the case for Daniel Craig with his performance in ‘Skyfall’, steely and physical while also suave and poised like the Bonds before him.

001 Pierce Brosnan



This may be a bit of a controversial choice but yes, Pierce Brosnan is my personal favorite James Bond. While he had already stepped down from the role by the time I started watching the Bond films, he was the first major actor in the role since I was born and as a result, he’s the one I most identify with the role… yes, even more so than Connery. As Bond, Brosnan found the perfect mix of Roger Moore’s charm and wit and Timothy Dalton’s emotional drive. In other words, he was a very well-rounded Bond. As far as his films went, admittedly they went down in quality with each subsequent installment after the brilliance that what his debut film, ‘GoldenEye’. But as far as his performances in the role were concerned, I’d argue that he was one of the most consistent of the 6 Bond leads and never really gave a ‘bad’ performance as Bond. It’s just a shame that some of his films didn’t live up to the quality of his performances. It may just be a case of personal preference, but at the end of the day, Pierce Brosnan is still my favorite James Bond.

Tuesday, October 27, 2015

Goosebumps (2015) review


If you’re a 90’s kid, then you’ll probably remember the classic horror franchise ‘Goosebumps’. Created in 1992 by R.L. Stine, ‘the Stephen King of children’s literature’, ‘Goosebumps’ both delighted and terrified audiences with its kid-friendly scary stories and surreal nature. As some would put it, it was sort of like a kid-friendly version of ‘Tales from the Crypt’ and of course it became a phenomenon, selling over 350 million books worldwide and even spawning a successful TV series that ran for 4 seasons from 1995 to 1998. And now in 2015, the characters of R.L. Stine’s books come to the big screen in a brand new ‘Goosebumps’ film. Given the anthology nature of the series, it did raise some questions about what kind of approach the filmmakers would take in translating the series to the big screen. Would this be a case of them adapting a single storyline at a time, resulting in a new horror film franchise? Ultimately the answer to that question is no because the route that they do take ends up being more meta in execution; one in which Stine himself is an actual character in the plot. And to the surprise of many, this film has actually been doing pretty well with critics, which I guess primarily stems from the fact that the last film the duo of director Rob Letterman and lead Jack Black worked on was 2010’s infamous remake of ‘Gulliver’s Travels’. But at the end of the day, their third film collaboration actually ends up being a pretty fun family horror film with a wide array of zany monsters and a surprising amount of heart.

The film begins as teenager Zach Cooper (Dylan Minnette) and his mother Gale (Amy Ryan) move from New York to the town of Madison, Delaware when his mother is hired to be the new vice-principal at the local high school. After they move in, Zach immediately befriends his next-door neighbor Hannah (Odeya Rush) but is warned by her mysterious father ‘Mr. Shivers’ (Jack Black) to stay away from her. One night when he hears her screaming, Zach and his new friend Champ (Ryan Lee) sneak into her house to try and find her. There they are surprised to come across numerous manuscripts of ‘Goosebumps’ stories but when they end up opening one of them, the monster of that story is released straight from the pages of the book. Zach and Champ soon learn that ‘Mr. Shivers’ is actually R.L. Stine himself and that the monsters that he had created in his stories had come to life when he was younger and had been trapped within the manuscripts so that they wouldn’t cause any trouble. But as a result of Zach and Champ’s interference, Stine’s other creations, led by the villainous wooden dummy Slappy (voiced by Black, who also voices the Invisible Boy), break out of their books as well with the intent on terrorizing the neighborhood and getting revenge upon Stine for trapping them within their manuscripts for so long, leaving Zach, Hannah, Stine, and Champ to try and defeat all of the author’s crazy creations.

Old-school ‘Goosebumps’ fans will most certainly appreciate the numerous amount of references and call-backs that are made to classic ‘Goosebumps’ stories. As noted earlier, because this is not just a case where one single ‘Goosebumps’ story is being adapted to film, this film basically features every major monster/creature from the original book series. Though with that said, because there are so many featured, some do get more attention than others, namely Slappy being that he’s basically the main villain of the film and it wouldn’t really be a ‘Goosebumps’ film without him. As for younger audiences who may not be that familiar with the series or are 100% newcomers to the franchise, the film will still manage to hold their interest with its large array of crazy monsters, likable lead characters, and its overall light-hearted tone. The film admittedly suffers at times due to how rushed it is due to the pacing but that also means that the film never really drags at any point either, although I will say that the film doesn’t really get going until the monsters start getting released from their books. I also can’t really go as far as to say that it’s the ‘scariest’ PG-rated horror film ever made as the film is more action/effects oriented, though this may also just be due to the fact that I’m older and have seen more adult-oriented horror films.

One of the things that surprised me the most about this film was that it had a surprising amount of heart. A lot of this comes from the two main leads, Zach and Hannah. Both Dylan Minnette and Odeya Rush do excellent jobs here; they have strong romantic chemistry and the romance between their characters is actually really sweet as far as teen romances are concerned. The two also end up having their own personal emotional arcs throughout the film. In the case of Zach, it’s him coping with the loss of his father, which is really conveyed well in a particularly touching scene near the beginning in which he looks at old footage of him and his dad. As for Hannah, it involves a particular plot point that I won’t spoil here but needless to say it’s a neatly executed twist that pays homage to a classic ‘Goosebumps’ story. Ryan Lee (AKA the fireworks-loving Cary from ‘Super 8’) is a major standout as well as the hopeless romantic but loyal friend Champ. The fact that I’m highlighting the kid actors first shows that despite having top billing, Jack Black as R.L. Stine actually isn’t the main character of the film. But even with that in mind, Black still does a really good job in the role and has his fair share of humorous lines, like a scene in which Stine makes a jab at Stephen King after being goaded into it by Zach. Black also does a nice job in providing the voice for Slappy and it should also be noted that the film version of Slappy is clearly modeled after Black as Stine.

As noted earlier, ‘Goosebumps’ is basically one of the big film ‘surprises’ of the year. That is because I have the feeling that many people weren’t expecting that much out of a film based off of a book series that has been around since the 90’s. But at the end of the day, ‘Goosebumps’ actually does avoid being nothing more than a cynical cash grab by instead being a fun little horror adventure that may not be the scariest family horror film of all-time but one that I think that both kids and adults can both enjoy. In the case of kids, it’s getting to see all of the fun and zany monsters while those who grew up with the ‘Goosebumps’ books and TV series will get a good dose of nostalgia. You’ll also be surprised to see that the film actually has a lot of charm and heart to it as well, which primarily stems from the genuinely sweet teen romance between the two main leads. I’ll admit that I’m not a ‘mega fan’ of this series despite being a part of the generation that grew up with it. I have read a few of the books and have watched multiple episodes of the TV series but it’s been a while since I’ve done either so I went into this film with a more casual perspective. And with that in mind I will say that this film is generally accessible to anyone whether they’re a fan of the series or not. If this ends up warranting a sequel then that gives Sony two big family-friendly horror-themed film franchises that they can work with, the other being the ‘Hotel Transylvania’ films.


Rating: 3.5/5

Friday, October 23, 2015

BOND MONTH: Top 10 Favorite/Least Favorite Bond 'Moments'

Over the span of 23 official Bond films, we’ve seen plenty of memorable moments involving our favorite MI6 agent, 007, from awesome action sequences to heartbreakingly tragic moments and so on and so forth. But of course with that said, there are also some moments within the franchise that were memorable for all the wrong reasons. They’re the moments that are hard to defend no matter how big of a fan you are of the franchise. So today, as part of Rhode Island Movie Corner’s second annual Bond Month, I will be listing 10 of my personal favorite and least favorite moments in the Bond franchise. I tried to keep it limited to one moment per film for variety but I’ll admit that there are at least one or two instances within these two lists where I may have at least two separate moments from one film listed just because certain films had quite a few great moments in them that made it hard to pick just one. Also, to keep things fair, this list won’t be including the classic moment when James Bond first introduces himself by name in ‘Dr. No’, and every subsequent Bond actor’s take on it, because that would just be too obvious in terms of where that would rank. So let’s just get it out of the way then, shall we? The ‘best’ moment in Bond history is the classic introduction of ‘Bond, James Bond’, first spoken by Sean Connery in ‘Dr. No’ and then repeated by all subsequent Bond lead actors. Now that we got that out of the way, let’s kick things off with my Top 10 Least Favorite Bond Moments.

10. THE OVERUSE OF SHERRIF J.W. PEPPER- LIVE AND LET DIE/THE MAN WITH THE GOLDEN GUN


To put things as nicely as I can, Louisiana Sherriff J.W. Pepper is quite the character that Bond comes across during his adventures. He first appears in ‘Live and Let Die’, where he ends up right in the middle of the speedboat chase between Bond and Kananga’s men in the Louisiana Bayou. But at the end of the day, maybe things would’ve been better off without him. Now for the record, I do sort of understand why they added him into ‘Live and Let Die’ in order to offset all of the racial stereotypes of that film. But even with that in mind, Pepper is basically the one thing that prevents me from listing that film as one of the all-time best entries of the Bond series, despite it being one of my personal favorites. Obviously meant to be the primary source of comic relief, the film continuously cuts to him during the boat chase. Not only does this drag out the already rather long action sequence even further but as many of you would agree, he also gets pretty darn grating at times with all of his yelling and racist comments. And then to make matters worse, they brought him back again for ‘The Man with the Golden Gun’. I’m not as positive towards that film compared to ‘Live and Let Die’ and, suffice it to say, the return of Pepper didn’t make it any better. Simply put, I guess you can say that Sheriff J.W. Pepper is the ‘Jar Jar Binks’ of the Bond franchise… a misguided attempt at comic relief.

9. GOOFING UP JAWS- MOONRAKER


I already talked about this when I listed Jaws in my Top 10 Bond Henchmen post so I won’t repeat myself here. Needless to say, the once highly intimidating Jaws was goofed up beyond belief in his second Bond outing and most of the time it just comes off a bit too weird, like when he first meets his girlfriend Dolly.

8. JAPANESE BOND- YOU ONLY LIVE TWICE


And the award for having one of the worst makeup jobs in film history goes to ‘You Only Live Twice’ for its failed attempt at making James Bond look Japanese. Yes in this film Bond, while undercover to investigate into the disappearances of American and Russian spacecraft, is briefly disguised as a Japanese man. But seriously, look at the picture above and tell me… does that look like a Japanese man to you? No, it looks more like a British man, who technically speaking is being played by a Scottish man. There seriously seems to have been no effort at all in trying to make look Sean Connery different other than changing his hair up a bit and Connery certainly doesn’t make any attempts to sound Japanese whatsoever. It’s funny because leading up to this part of the film there’s a scene in which Bond being prepped for his disguise. And yet, as I just noted earlier, nothing much changed in terms of Sean Connery’s appearance save for his hairstyle so ultimately that scene is entirely pointless. It’s quite amazing that no one in the film is able to see past this poor excuse for a disguise. It’s about as obvious as the many disguises that Team Rocket have worn in the ‘Pokémon’ anime but just like Ash and his friends in that show, everyone in this film seems to fall for it.

7. THE BEACH BOYS? - A VIEW TO A KILL


Taking the Number 7 spot is one of two moments on this list that were ruined by questionable sound design choices. First up is the opening sequence of ‘A View to a Kill’ in which Bond escapes from a bunch of bad guys in Siberia on skis. As far as Bond skiing sequences go, this one is just okay. It’s not terrible by any means but not particularly memorable either, although it did in, in a way, help popularize snowboarding. But then for some reason the track ‘California Girls’ by the Beach Boys (note: This version was actually a cover performed by the band Gidea Park) starts playing and it’s just… weird. It’s just like Madonna’s ‘Die Another Day’ and Jack White and Alicia Keys’ ‘Another Way to Die’ in that it just feels completely out of place for a Bond film except in this case it’s during an actual scene in the film and isn’t just a part of the opening credits. Thankfully it doesn’t last for long, about only one or two minutes or so, but it’s still a very odd way to start off a Bond film.

6. ELEPHANT JACKPOT- DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER


This was the moment that effectively made it impossible for me to take ‘Diamonds Are Forever’ seriously due to how incredibly campy it is. Now for the record I’m not saying that I don’t like the campier style Bond films because I do, with films like ‘Goldfinger’ and ‘Octopussy’ serving as prime examples of this. It’s just that some do a better job than others when it comes to executing this style, and ‘Diamonds Are Forever’ isn’t one of those films, which is a shame given that it’s directed by the same guy who did ‘Goldfinger’, Guy Hamilton. At first, it’s not too bad. I was fine with the quirky duo of Mr. Wint and Mr. Kidd and I was fine with the film being primarily set in Las Vegas, which meant that this was going to be a much flashier Bond film compared to its immediate predecessors. But then we get to the scene in which Tiffany Case collects a shipment of diamonds at the Circus Casino and that’s where the film starts to go downhill for me. It ends with a quick shot of an elephant at a slot machine, where it ‘hits the jackpot’ and trumpets in celebration. I can’t really explain why but this scene just rubbed me the wrong way and after that, the film just got goofier and goofier and not in a good way. Bond drives a moon buggy, Blofeld dresses in women’s clothing, and so on and so forth. At the end of the day, ‘Diamonds are Forever’ is by no means the ‘worst’ Bond film of all-time but due to a lot of its overly goofy moments, namely the jackpot-winning elephant, it’s not really one of my favorites.      


5. DOUBLE-TAKING PIGEON- MOONRAKER


But when it comes to odd animal antics in Bond films, nothing is more infamous than the double-taking pigeon from ‘Moonraker’. The sequence in which it appears is already goofy as is, with Bond driving onto the Venice walkways in, to put it quite simply, a ‘Gondola Hovercraft’. Of course we then see a couple of reaction shots from the crowd, including a bunch of stunned onlookers, a guy looking at his drink, and of course, that pigeon. Now to be frank, this moment actually doesn’t really bother me as much as you might think. In a way, I’m much more critical of the ‘elephant at the casino’ scene from ‘Diamonds are Forever’ than I am towards this scene. Still, it’s impossible to deny that this moment is just bizarre and is a lot more infamous than the elephant scene, hence why it’s ranked higher on this list. These last two moments are the kind of things in films that make you question the thought process that went into creating these sequences. What’s next? Bond swinging through the trees and yelling like Tarzan? Oh wait…

4. OLD ROGER MOORE- A VIEW TO A KILL


Roger Moore starred in the most ‘official’ Bond films out of the 6 actors who have played Bond for Eon Productions with, fittingly enough, 7 appearances as 007. However, by the time production started on his final Bond film, ‘A View to a Kill’, he was 57 years old. He was so old that he ended up learning that he was even older than the mother of his co-star, Tanya Roberts. That alone was a major warning sign that he was way too old for the part. As a result, scenes of him seducing his female co-stars are incredibly awkward and uncomfortable because of it. Not only that, but Moore is shown to have aged considerably since ‘Octopussy’. Apparently he had a facelift done prior to production and needless to say it’s clearly noticeable. Because of his age, most of the action sequences in the film are clearly being done by his stunt double and the film makes little effort to cover this up. Now let me be clear; Roger Moore was an excellent James Bond. He was both charming and witty, effectively creating a new take on the character that may not have been completely in line with the original Ian Fleming novels but was iconic nevertheless. But clearly Moore should have stepped down from the role at a much earlier point in time so that it wouldn’t get to the point where he just didn’t look convincing in the role of Bond anymore because that’s what exactly what happened with his final James Bond film.

3. CGI-SURFING BOND- DIE ANOTHER DAY


Yes it’s the moment that pretty much single-handedly nearly destroyed the Bond franchise until the series was rebooted in 2006 with ‘Casino Royale’. It’s the infamous sequence from ‘Die Another Day’ when Bond surfs on a wave caused by a melting glacier. Now for the record folks, I’m not that big of a critic when it comes to CGI so I’m not necessarily ‘as bothered’ by this as many other people on the internet are. But still, it’s impossible to deny the absolute ridiculousness of the sequence and the fact that it happened in, of all things, a Bond film. It’s crazy that a series that has always been known for practical stunt-work went against that in favor of CGI action for this particular film. It’s very much clear that Brosnan isn’t actually surfing that wave and that Bond is just a digital double in any shot that’s not a close-up. Seriously, couldn’t they have just filmed this scene in like a soundstage or something? I’m pretty sure they could’ve just filmed this entire scene on the 007 Stage or somewhere just to make it look halfway decent. But ultimately they didn’t and as a result, it’s one of the most infamous moments in Bond franchise history which definitely wasn’t a good thing considering that this film was meant to honor the franchise’s 40th anniversary.

2. SLIDE-WHISTLE CAR JUMP- THE MAN WITH THE GOLDEN GUN


The reason why this sequence from ‘The Man with the Golden Gun’ is as high up as it is on the list, even going as far as topping the infamous surfing scene from ‘Die Another Day’, is because if it wasn’t for one simple element of this scene, this would actually be amongst the series’ best moments. The sight of Bond’s car in a 360 degree spin as it jumps across two ramps is a pretty damn awesome stunt. So why then, some of you might ask, is this is a ‘bad’ moment? Because some moron thought it was a good idea to add a slide-whistle sound effect. This would be the first of two instances in the Bond franchise when an action sequence is marred by a terrible sound design choice, the other being the aforementioned implementation of the song ‘California Girls’ by The Beach Boys into the opening sequence of ‘A View to a Kill’. But whereas that sequence is by no means one of the best sequences in franchise history, this car jumping stunt is amazing because at the time it was considered impossible to pull off. It’s too bad then that the scene ended up getting ruined by the use of a slide whistle. Why? Well, I have no idea and I haven’t found anything on the internet that explains why this decision was made. Thankfully there are some videos online that remove this sound effect but unfortunately, the film itself hasn’t gotten a ‘George Lucas Special Edition’ update so we’re still stuck with this oddity in sound design that puts a major damper on one of the series’ best stunts.

1. NEVER FINDING CLOSURE FOR THE DEATH OF TRACY BOND- DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER/FOR YOUR EYES ONLY


My pick for the ‘Worst’ moment in franchise history isn’t a questionable sound choice or an infamous sequence predominantly done with CGI. Instead, the top spot goes to what is, in my opinion, the series’ biggest missed opportunity; a proper conclusion to the storyline that was set up at the end of one of the best Bond films of all-time, ‘On Her Majesty’s Secret Service’. Of course, as we all know, the film ended with the tragic death of James Bond’s first wife Tracy by Blofeld and Irma Bunt just a few minutes after the two were married. But despite the possibility of Bond seeking vengeance against the two for his wife’s death, as he did in Ian Fleming’s immediate follow-up to ‘OHMSS’, ‘You Only Live Twice’, the series has never really done this idea justice. Obviously one of the main reasons for this was due to the fact that the series had already adapted ‘You Only Live Twice’ just two years earlier, albeit under a much different plot. But then you also have to take into account the fact that the film’s Bond, George Lazenby, left the franchise after just one film. I’ve heard rumors that the filmmakers were considering reshooting the final scene with Sean Connery when he returned to the role of Bond for ‘Diamonds Are Forever’ but obviously that never came to fruition. Also, Ilse Steppat, the actress who played Irma Bunt, the one who was firing the gun that killed Tracy, sadly passed away in December of 1969, so the character ended up getting cut.

So ultimately, the opening sequence of ‘Diamonds Are Forever’ implied that Bond was going after Blofeld to avenge Tracy’s death. But ‘implied’ is the key word here because it’s never explicitly stated that this is what’s happening. And ultimately, the fact that Connery is back as Bond makes me believe that this was not meant to be following up on its predecessor’s ending. The closest the series got to ‘finishing’ this storyline was with ‘For Your Eyes Only’. It opens with a particularly touching moment in which Bond visits Tracy’s grave, which then leads to him basically defeating Blofeld for good by dropping him into a smoke stack. But here’s the thing… it’s only implied that the person Bond kills during this sequence is Blofeld because, due to legal issues with Kevin McClory, the filmmakers couldn’t actually refer to him by name in the film. And even if it was Blofeld, the way he goes out is a laughably mediocre way to kill off a character like Blofeld. Thankfully, Eon recently re-acquired the rights to use Blofeld and Spectre and obviously, the next Bond film will be re-introducing the organization. Because of this, as sacrilegious as it may sound to a lot of people, I actually want to see them remake ‘On Her Majesty’s Secret Service’ if only so that they could do the storyline of Bond and his wife Tracy proper justice.

AND NOW MY TOP 10 FAVORITE BOND MOMENTS

10. HONEY RYDER’S FIRST APPEARANCE- DR. NO


Kicking off the Top 10 list is not only one of the most famous moments in franchise history but cinema history as well, as Ursula Andress’ Honey Ryder emerges from the water in a white bikini singing ‘Under the Mango Tree’. Ultimately though, the reason why this scene is only at the #10 spot is because while it is undoubtedly iconic as far as the Bond franchise is concerned, Honey Ryder doesn’t actually do that much in the film compared to other Bond girls that came after her. She doesn’t appear until the film’s about halfway over and despite having a backstory where her father was killed while on Crab Key, the island of the titular Dr. No, ultimately she just ends up being the ‘damsel in distress’ for Bond to save. Still, it’s hard to deny the impact that this scene had on both the franchise and the film industry as one of the most beautiful women in the world at that time strode onto the scene in her sultry get-up, setting the standard that would define all future Bond girls to come. Oh yeah and that ‘sultry get-up’ ended up boosting bikini sales at the time and sold for about £35,000 when it was put up for auction in 2001. It’s that iconic.

9. BOND CONSOLES VESPER- CASINO ROYALE


There were a lot of great moments in Daniel Craig’s first Bond film, ‘Casino Royale’, making it rather hard for me to limit it to the two that ultimately made it into this list. The first of these two moments isn’t an action sequence but instead a nice little romantic scene involving Bond and Vesper Lynd. This scene takes place after Bond and Vesper dispatch a few assassins who were trying to kill Le Chiffre. After the two return to their room and Bond cleans up a bit, he finds Vesper sitting in the shower, visibly shaken by what had just gone down, unlike Bond who has obviously been in situations like this before. For what can ostensibly be referred to as a ‘shower scene’, this sequence is in no way sexual, to the point where Daniel Craig vetoed the idea of Vesper appearing only in her underwear. This scene might have turned out differently in an earlier Bond film but here it comes off as a much more emotional and romantic moment between these two growing lovers that also works well with Craig’s more vulnerable/emotionally-driven Bond. Backed by one of the best tracks from David Arnold’s score, simply titled ‘Vesper’, it’s a scene that one usually wouldn’t expect from a James Bond film but is handled perfectly.

8. BOND VS. GRANT- FROM RUSSIA WITH LOVE


Now we go back to one of the earliest action sequences of the franchise; the thrilling fight sequence between Bond and assassin Red Grant onboard the Orient Express. I won’t go into too much detail over this scene as I basically already talked about it earlier this month when I listed Grant as one of the series’ best henchmen. To reiterate what I stated in that post, the sequence had great build-up leading into it, with Grant, who has been tailing Bond around Istanbul for the majority of the film, going undercover and posing as ‘Agent Nash’ to gain Bond’s trust. Then after a while, he gains the upper hand, drugging Tatiana and subduing Bond. After revealing to Bond SPECTRE’s plan to have him steal the Lektor for them, Bond is able to trick Grant into opening his booby-trapped attaché case full of tear gas, which then leads into their fight onboard the train, ultimately culminating with Bond defeating Grant by strangling him with his own garrote. It’s a well-directed and well-edited sequence that works incredibly well around the limitations of the enclosed space of Bond and Tatiana’s sleeping car. Simply put, it may have been from one of the earliest of Eon’s Bond films but it’s still one of the series’ best fight scenes.

7. TANK CHASE THROUGH ST. PETERSBURG- GOLDENEYE


James Bond in a tank… need I say more?

6. REMOTE-CONTROLLED CAR CHASE- TOMORROW NEVER DIES


The Bond franchise has seen quite a lot of great car chases over the years, from the aforementioned car-tank chase through St. Petersburg in ‘GoldenEye’ to the on land and subsequently underwater chase sequence in ‘The Spy Who Loved Me’. But if I had to pick my favorite car chase from this series, it would have to be the one from ‘Tomorrow Never Dies’, in which Bond escapes from Elliot Carver’s henchmen in a parking garage in Hamburg, Germany. What makes this sequence so special is that Bond’s car, a BMW 750i, is remote-controlled, allowing him to drive around the garage from the backseat. At one point, he even jumps out of the car, remotely drives it up to the top of the parking garage, and then off of the roof where it oh so gently lands in the middle of, fittingly enough, a car-rental office. Of course the car comes with other accessories as well, such as a rear-bumper caltrop dispenser and a tear-gas/electric shock security system to prevent anyone else from using it, but ultimately the coolest part of this car is the remote-control system. ‘Tomorrow Never Dies’ may have been rather by-the-numbers as far as Bond films are concerned, but it at least has the benefit of having one hell of a car chase sequence.

5. THE GOLDEN GIRL- GOLDFINGER


Following in the footsteps of Ursula Andress’ iconic entrance in ‘Dr. No’ is another classic moment of both Bond and cinema history; the sight of a girl completely covered in gold paint from head to toe. It happens right at the beginning of the film, when Bond is in Miami Beach investigating bullion dealer Auric Goldfinger. He comes across Goldfinger’s assistant, Jill Masterson, and after the two of them prevent Goldfinger from cheating at gin rummy, they end up in bed together. But then Bond is knocked out by a mysterious figure in a bowler hat (AKA Oddjob) and when he comes to, he finds Jill completely covered in gold paint and dead from ‘epidermal suffocation’. Now many of you have probably heard the internet myth that Shirley Eaton, who played Jill, died during the filming of that scene due to asphyxiation from the gold paint. But, as proven by the fact that Eaton is still alive, obviously this wasn’t true. That and it’s also been proven that you can’t really die from being covered in gold paint. This moment was even re-interpreted in ‘Quantum of Solace’ when agent Fields is drowned in oil, though ultimately that scene was nowhere near as iconic. Needless to say, the first shot of Jill covered in gold paint is a striking image that has defined the Bond franchise for many years.

4. CHASE THROUGH MADAGASCAR- CASINO ROYALE


It was hard to pick just one of the many great action sequences from ‘Casino Royale’ for this list. I could’ve gone with the black-and-white pre-credits sequence, the insane Aston Martin car crash where it flips seven times (which actually set a Guinness World Record), or the final shootout inside a crumbling building in Venice culminating in Vesper’s death. Hell, I could’ve even gone with the scene in which Bond is tortured by Le Chiffre if solely due to how excruciating it is for any male viewer to see Bond whacked in the nuts multiple times. But, ultimately I decided to go with the first ‘major’ action sequence in the film in which Bond pursues a bomb maker named Mollaka through Madagascar, which ends up taking them through a construction site and comes to a conclusion at an embassy, where Bond ends up shooting Mollaka, even though it’s against his orders, and escapes by causing an explosion. After all of the CGI-laden action sequences of ‘Die Another Day’, it was so refreshing to see the series return to its roots when it came to doing all of its major action sequences practically. It also did a nice job in establishing the grittier side of Craig’s Bond, which really helped up the tension of the entire sequence as it does in many other sequences in the film. This, along with the amazing pre-credits sequence, helped immediately prove how great of a job Daniel Craig would do in the role of Bond after all of the backlash that came from his initial casting.

3. SKI JUMP- THE SPY WHO LOVED ME


What more can be said about this classic moment from the pre-credits sequence of ‘The Spy Who Loved Me’? The shot of Bond ski jumping off of a mountain in the Alps (technically the scene was shot at Mount Asgard in Canada but that’s beside the point) and opening his parachute to reveal a Union Jack canopy is a quintessential Bond moment that had audiences cheering when it was first released in theaters. Admittedly it almost led to the death of stuntman Rick Sylvester when one of his skis clipped the chute, which could’ve prevented it from opening, but thankfully that didn’t happen and as a result, this was a great start to what would be one of the all-time greatest Bond films.

2. CHASE THROUGH THE LONDON UNDERGROUND- SKYFALL


‘Skyfall’ was another tough film to crack when it came to picking the ‘best’ moment from it because there are so many to choose from. I seriously could make a Top 10 list solely consisting of moments from this film alone; the pre-credits sequence, the beautiful title sequence (which of course I talked about two weeks ago), the darkly lit fight sequence between Bond and Patrice, the first appearance of Raoul Silva, the first scene between Bond and Q, the finale at Skyfall (and yes I’ve heard all of the comparisons to ‘Home Alone), the death of M… I could go on and on. But in the end I decided to go with the chase sequence involving Bond and Silva through the London Underground as the latter escapes from MI6 custody and heads to M’s public inquiry in order to kill her. Bond chases him throughout the London Underground, with the help of Q back at MI6 headquarters, and at one point during the chase, Silva blows up part of the Underground which results in a train crashing into the tunnel that Bond is currently in. It all culminates in a shootout at the inquiry that involves a lot of the film’s main characters; Bond, Silva, M, Mallory, Moneypenny, etc.  


Now some nitpickers out there will no doubt point out that Silva’s plan on a whole seemed a bit too ridiculous, like how he had to have known when the train would be coming so that it would crash down into the tunnel at the right time or that M would be at an inquiry. But quite frankly I don’t care because it’s a Bond film; it’s not like something as ridiculous as this hasn’t happened before in these films (CGI glacier surfing, anyone?). I’ve stated before that Silva is sort of like the Joker, and this scene is very much inspired by the scene from ‘The Dark Knight’ in how Silva manages to outwit his adversaries every step of the way. The whole sequence itself is highly thrilling from beginning to end. It’s cool to see Bond partake in a chase sequence through London, and it even features a few bits of humor that, although a staple of the franchise, have been rather absent from the Craig era of the franchise, like when the random citizen remarks that Bond is ‘keen to get home’ when he leaps onto a train as it leaves the station and the moment right after that where Bond has to repeat himself when he asks the stunned train operator to ‘open the door’. The build-up to the shootout at the inquiry is also incredible, with M’s reading of a poem by Tennyson backed by one of Thomas Newman’s best tracks from the film’s score. All in all, this is just one hell of a well-done chase sequence from one of the best James Bond films of all-time… maybe even the best Bond film period.

1. THE DEATH OF TRACY BOND- ON HER MAJESTY’S SECRET SERVICE


Perhaps it’s only fitting that I top both my personal favorite and least favorite Bond moments lists with points that relate to the finale of one of the series’ greatest, and in some cases a bit underrated’ efforts, ‘On Her Majesty’s Secret Service’; the death of Tracy Bond. In the worst of list, I talked about how the series never really followed up on this ending, in other words have Bond get revenge against Blofeld and Irma Bunt for the death of his wife. There were moments in the openings of ‘Diamonds Are Forever’ and ‘For Your Eyes Only’ which seemingly tried to tie up this loose end but quite frankly they weren’t handled very well. But as for the death of Tracy itself, there’s no denying that it is easily the saddest moment in the history of the Bond franchise. Even if you aren’t a Bond fan, this is still one of the most heartbreaking finales in film history. Everything seemed good for Bond and Tracy after they were married. Now that they had ‘all the time in the world’, they were ready to start their new lives together. But then, in come Blofeld and Irma Bunt to screw all of that up, proving that Bond will never be able to truly live a normal life. Many have criticized George Lazenby for being too wooden in his first and only turn as Bond but that’s not the case for the scene in which he tearfully tells a police officer that “It’s quite all right, really. She’s having a rest. We’ll be going on soon. There’s no hurry, you see. We have all the time in the world”.


NEXT WEEK: I’ll be ranking all 6 of Eon’s Bond leads, from Sean Connery to Daniel Craig.

Wednesday, October 21, 2015

Bridge of Spies (2015) review


What can be said about Steven Spielberg and Tom Hanks that hasn’t been said before? They’re two of the biggest and most beloved names in the film industry and in 1998, the two teamed up for the first time for that year’s highly acclaimed war drama, ‘Saving Private Ryan’. Since then, Hanks has starred in two other Spielberg films, 2002’s ‘Catch Me if You Can’ and 2004’s ‘The Terminal’, and the two of them also co-produced a pair of WWII-set HBO miniseries in 2001’s ‘Band of Brothers’ and 2010’s ‘The Pacific’. One whole decade after their last film collaboration ‘The Terminal’, Hanks and Spielberg re-unite again on the big screen in the latter’s latest directorial effort, ‘Bridge of Spies’. Co-written by another famous duo, the Coen Brothers, ‘Bridge of Spies’ sees the duo of Hanks and Spielberg take on a different war; the Cold War. This film tells the true story of the 1960 U-2 incident in which lawyer James B. Donovan negotiated the prisoner exchange of U-2 pilot Francis Gary Powers and Soviet spy Rudolf Abel after he had previously defended the latter in court and, most importantly, kept him from getting a death sentence. And ultimately while the film can be a bit dry at times, there’s still no denying the masterclass effort that comes from Spielberg’s direction, the performances of its two main leads, and this film’s excellent representation of what life was like during the Cold War.

The year is 1957 with both the U.S. and Russia firmly locked into the paranoia of the Cold War as each anticipate/fear a potential nuclear attack from either side. In Brooklyn, Rudolf Abel (Mark Rylance) is arrested by police on the charge of being a Soviet spy. With the intention of at least giving Abel a fair trial so that it won’t come across as some sort of Soviet propaganda, insurance lawyer James B. Donovan (Tom Hanks) is tasked with being Abel’s lawyer in court. Despite the clear fact that Abel will be convicted as well as the backlash that he ends up facing from the American people for defending Abel in court, Donovan takes on the case and while he ultimately does lose it, he manages to convince the Judge to lower Abel’s sentence from a death sentence so that he could one day be useful in the case that the U.S. needs to bargain with the Soviet Union. Sure enough, that day comes when pilot Francis Gary Powers (Austin Stowell) gets shot down in the Soviet Union while undertaking a reconnaissance mission for the CIA. This results in Donovan being sent to East Berlin as a ‘neutral negotiator’ in a prisoner exchange involving Powers and Abel, which gets a bit more complicated when another American, student Frederic Pryor, also gets captured, in this case by East Germany in the midst of the construction of the Berlin Wall, on spy charges.

Watching this film, there’s no denying the strength of Spielberg’s direction; how he constructs his scenes and how they are paced. Everything that you can normally expect from a Spielberg film is here from the excellent cinematography by Spielberg regular Janusz Kaminski to a majestic score which in this case was not done by Spielberg’s go-to composer John Williams but by Thomas Newman instead. Spielberg also really excels in establishing the ‘Cold War’ atmosphere and the paranoia that came from both sides of this conflict, especially in the U.S. as shown through how Donovan is initially viewed as a social pariah amongst his fellow citizens for defending a ‘traitor’ in court. All of this, for the most part, makes up for the film’s primary issue and that is that it admittedly drags at times and other times can come off a bit dry. Now obviously because this takes place in the Cold War, the film is more focused on politics than it is about the action. For the record, this film does manage to be engaging from beginning to end, primarily due to its strong morals as displayed by Donovan, but ultimately for what’s classified a thriller, there’s not that much tension because we know what’s going to happen and Donovan is never in any real danger. That and, even for a film that’s 141 minutes long, it has to cover quite a lot of ground. It’s basically two stories in one; Donovan’s defense of Abel in court and his subsequent negotiations to get back Powers and Pryor.

Tom Hanks is, well, Tom Hanks. He’s practically a national treasure at this point. You know that he’s going to be good no matter what, especially in a Spielberg film, and of course he’s excellent here as the Atticus Finch-esque Donovan. In a country that, at the time, was broiled in the politics of the Cold War, Donovan worked to preserve the ideals of the Constitution (AKA ‘The Rulebook’ as he illustrates in a scene in which he’s talking with a member of the CIA) even during a case he clearly wasn’t going to win. Donovan may not be a particularly deep lead character but Hanks imbues him with the everyman quality that he is so great at doing, making him very likable through and through. Hanks is backed up by a solid supporting cast that also includes Amy Ryan as Donovan’s wife and Alan Alda as his legal partner Thomas Watters but the biggest standout of the film ends up being Mark Rylance as Rudolf Abel. Rylance plays the role with a quiet thoughtfulness and, in a way, a bit of an unsuspecting nature as Abel is only once shown to do anything spy-related. Like Donovan, Abel stays true to his morals as he refuses to become an ally of the United States government even though that would help him get out of his current predicament as a prisoner of the United States. I can definitely see why Spielberg casted Rylance in the lead role/titular character of his next film, his adaptation of Roald Dahl’s ‘The BFG’, because this is easily one of the best performances that I’ve seen this entire year.

I can’t really say that ‘Bridge of Spies’ is one of Spielberg’s best films, even though it’s certainly been getting some of the best reviews of any film that he’s ever directed. The film does do its job in recreating the world of the Cold War as well as the paranoia and fear that came from this part of U.S. history through the eyes of a man who fought to preserve the country’s morals even if it made him an outcast in his home country. It’s just that, even for a film that’s over two and a half hours long, it has to basically cover two stories in that runtime; the case of Rudolf Abel and the prisoner exchange for Francis Gary Powers. And as a result, the film admittedly can be both a bit dry and a bit overlong at times and there’s not as much tension as it wants to have. But at the end of the day, this is still a Steven Spielberg film and you can always expect a well-crafted and well-directed effort whenever he’s behind the camera. As some of you might have guessed from an earlier analogy that I made, the story of James B. Donovan and Rudolf Abel reminded me of ‘To Kill a Mockingbird’. Donovan is basically this story’s ‘Atticus Finch’ as both display the same morals from a political and human standpoint. So in short, while I can’t really list this as one of my favorite films of this year, ‘Bridge of Spies’ definitely delivers when it comes to being the kind of film that you’d expect to see from Steven Spielberg.


Rating: 4/5

Friday, October 16, 2015

BOND MONTH: Top 10 Favorite Bond Theme Songs


(Disclaimer: The majority of this post was written before the release of the main theme song for ‘Spectre’, ‘Writing’s on the Wall’, performed by Sam Smith. To keep things fair, and to enforce the main ground-rule that I set of not having anything related to the newest Bond film included in these Bond Month posts, this new song will not be featured anywhere in this forthcoming Top 10. But before I get on with the main list, here’s a quick little sum-up on my thoughts towards the new Bond theme. Ultimately it seems that, contrary to popular opinion, I really like this song. While I’ll admit that I’m not completely onboard with Smith’s falsetto vocals, the song does still have that classic Bond aura, with a romanticized feel that mirrors that of classic Bond songs like ‘For Your Eyes Only’ and ‘The World is Not Enough’. Do I like this better than, say, ‘Skyfall’? No not really but it certainly isn’t as bad as some people on the internet are putting it out to be. Ultimately I will say this; kudos to you Sam Smith for doing a solid job with this new song and I am very much looking forward to see it paired with Daniel Kleinman’s sure-to-be-amazing opening titles for ‘Spectre’. Now on to the main event…)

Aside from the Bond girls, the villains, their henchmen, and of course Bond himself, one of the most important parts of any James Bond film, well to be specific almost every Bond film since ‘Goldfinger’, is the main title song that plays over the opening credits. And for the most part, a lot of the main title songs for the Bond films have been really, really good as they do a great job in enveloping you in the world of 007 with their grandiose compositions that can either be slow and idyllic or fast and bombastic. Yeah there have been a few stinkers over the years but I do think that the good has outweighed the bad so far. So today, as part of Rhode Island Movie Corner’s second annual Bond Month, I will be listing my Top 10 personal favorite Bond title songs of all-time. For the record, that only accounts for the songs that were performed by artists and not the themes that were solely instrumental scores. So as a result, that means that you won’t be seeing ‘Dr. No’, ‘From Russia with Love’, and ‘On Her Majesty’s Secret Service’ on this list. Though I do want to note that I absolutely love the music for all three of those title sequences. Of course ‘Dr. No’ debuted the iconic Bond theme by Monty Norman (which, let’s be honest, would’ve been Number 1 on this list) but then there’s also ‘James Bond is Back’ in ‘From Russia With Love’ as well as John Barry’s excellent main motif for ‘On Her Majesty’s Secret Service’, which was even featured in the most recent trailer for ‘Spectre’. But first, before we get to the Top 10 best, here are my Top 5 ‘least favorite’ Bond title songs… I say least favorite because I don’t really ‘hate’ any of these songs but still these are my picks for the weakest Bond themes.

5. TOMORROW NEVER DIES- SHERYL CROW


Now my main issue with ‘Tomorrow Never Dies’ isn’t really with the song itself. I like the melody and music for the song and I do feel that it definitely sounds like a Bond theme in that regard. My main issue with it is actually in regards to who they chose to perform the song, Sheryl Crow. Quite simply I think that she was the wrong choice to be the main artist for the song. This song features quite a few high notes, primarily during the main chorus, and whenever Crow does those notes, I feel that she comes off a bit too whiny. Then there’s also the fact that this wasn’t even originally the main theme for the film. At first, it was going to be the song ‘Surrender’ (previously named ‘Tomorrow Never Dies’), written by composer David Arnold and performed by k.d. lang, that would open the film. Heck, it was even implemented into Arnold's score. But apparently the studio wanted a more ‘popular’ artist to perform the song and so ‘Surrender’, which to be perfectly frank is a much better song, was relegated to the end credits. But like I said earlier, I’m fine with the song for the most part. Ultimately it’s just due to the choice of singer that prevents me from listing this as one of my favorite Bond themes.

4. MOONRAKER- SHIRLEY BASSEY


As much as I hate to do it, unfortunately I have to list a Bond theme song from the legendary Shirley Bassey amongst the worst in the series and it’s no surprise then that it comes from one of the least popular entries in the series, ‘Moonraker’. Though I will admit that upon re-watch, I’m actually a lot more positive towards the film compared to the first time I watch it. Hell, I think it’s a little underrated. But I’m getting off track here… as for the title song, Bassey unfortunately can’t save this from being the weakest of the three title songs that she performed for the Bond franchise, the other two being ‘Goldfinger’ and ‘Diamonds Are Forever’. I do like that the song has a nice calm and soothing feel to it, which is a nice contrast to some of the bolder Bond themes, and Bassey of course is great as always performance wise. But this song’s biggest issue comes with its lyrics, which has to implement the term ‘Moonraker’ into the song. Seriously, what is a ‘Moonraker’? Now for the record, Bond theme songs have never really been known for having ‘great’ lyrics anyway but this is one of the rare cases where it’s really noticeable. Shirley Bassey may have performed some of the most iconic themes in Bond history but unfortunately she had to close out her tenure with the franchise (at the moment) on a very weak note.

3. THE MAN WITH THE GOLDEN GUN- LULU


This seems to be one of the more polarizing Bond themes as I’ve heard quite a few people say that they either love it or hate it. For those who do like it, I’ve heard them say that they’ll even go as far and say that it’s one of the only good parts of the ‘The Man with the Golden Gun’ aside from Christopher Lee as Scaramanga. As for me, though, this one just isn’t a Bond song that I’m particularly a big fan of. Heck, even John Barry didn’t like it. He even went as far as to say that it was the ‘weakest’ of all of his compositions. To be honest, there’s not much else I can say about this song. I do kind of like the rock-style beat of the song, and it’s rather interesting to note that is considered to be one of the more ‘risqué’ Bond songs in terms of its lyrics, but it just didn’t stand out to me that much compared to other theme songs from the series.

2. ANOTHER WAY TO DIE (QUANTUM OF SOLACE) - JACK WHITE/ALICIA KEYS


While this will always have a place in franchise history, being the first major Bond theme song to be performed as a duet, it’s also one of the weakest of the series. The main reason is quite simple; when you listen to it, it doesn’t really feel like a ‘Bond theme’. It feels like a song that’s more suitable for a different action film. I mean sure, in a way it does kind of reflect the edgier style of Craig’s Bond but it still doesn’t really have that grandiose feel to it like many other Bond themes do. And just like ‘Tomorrow Never Dies’, this song was selected at the expense of better songs. But unlike that film, these particular songs didn’t get the honor of at least being put in the end credits. There was the song ‘Forever, I Am All Yours’ by Eva Almer, which even featured the quote from ‘Casino Royale’ in which Bond tells Vesper that ‘he had no armor left’, which would have been a great way to connect to the main plots of Craig’s first two Bond themes. And then, for the second time in franchise history, there was also a song written by David Arnold (following the aforementioned ‘Surrender’) that got ignored that was actually performed by none other than Shirley Bassey. Seriously, wouldn’t it have been cool to see Bassey come back for one last Bond theme song, especially if it meant that her career with the franchise could’ve concluded on a better note than ‘Moonraker’? But ultimately that was not the case and we got stuck with a rather mediocre Bond theme for a very lackluster Bond film… hmm in that case it’s kind of a perfect fit, actually. But ultimately the ‘worst’ Bond theme comes from, fittingly enough, one of the series’ weakest installments…

1. DIE ANOTHER DAY- MADONNA


Well this one is a rather obvious pick, isn’t it? Usually it’s either this or ‘Another Way to Die’ that dominates the conversation when it comes to people listing their picks for the ‘worst’ Bond theme of all-time though usually this gets brought up more. While I’ll admit that I don’t ‘hate’ this song as much as a lot of people do, to the point where I’ll embarrassingly admit that I have it on my IPod (don’t ask…), at the same time it is by no means a ‘Bond theme’. That’s ultimately the major issue with it in my opinion. It doesn’t really have the right feel to it that would make it a proper Bond theme. It sounds too much like a pop song, which is fitting in the sense that it’s done by ‘the Queen of Pop’ but not fitting for a James Bond film. Where’s the grandeur and class? Instead, all we get is a techno beat that, like ‘Another Way to Die’, seems better suited for a non-Bond action film. With no disrespect towards Madonna, it’s clear that she wasn’t the best choice to be the artist for a Bond theme. It was because of this song, and partially ‘Another Way to Die’ as well, that almost made me fearful that ‘Skyfall’ was going to turn out the same way… thankfully that wouldn’t be the case.

And now… onto the Top 10…

10. FOR YOUR EYES ONLY- SHEENA EASTON


There are three types of Bond Themes; fast and upbeat, grand and majestic, and slow and romantic. ‘For Your Eyes Only’ by Sheena Easton is perhaps my favorite case of the ‘slow and romantic’ style of Bond themes. The film ‘For Your Eyes Only’ did sort of have a rather romanticized feel to it so the song does fit pretty nicely with it. If you recall last week, I listed this film’s title sequence as one of the weakest in series history. Sure it did have the distinction of actually featuring Easton within the sequence but ultimately I feel that it came off a bit awkward in terms of its overall execution. But as for the song itself, it’s great. Easton is solid in her performance and, as a result, her song is easily one of the best parts, hell maybe even the absolute best part, of Roger Moore’s 5th James Bond film.

9. GOLDENEYE- TINA TURNER


A lot of times, Bond composers like John Barry and David Arnold have been able to implement the main title song into their scores. But in the case of ‘GoldenEye’, composer Eric Serra was unable to use the film’s title song in the score because the producers didn’t collaborate with the songwriters, Bono and the Edge. Though ultimately I think it really would’ve helped the score out if it was able to utilize the title song because unfortunately Serra’s score is one of the weakest in the franchise; it’s probably the only gripe that I have with the film as a whole. This is mostly due to the fact that there are quite a few instances where it goes a bit too melancholy, feeling rather unfitting for a Bond score. But as for the title song, ‘GoldenEye’ is definitely a classic Bond theme. It’s very much reminiscent of ‘Goldfinger’ and Tina Turner definitely has that Shirley Bassey vibe in her performance of the song. Pair this with a classic opening titles sequence and you have one hell of an opening for one of Bond’s best adventures.

8. THE LIVING DAYLIGHTS- A-HA


Now it’s time to delve into some of the more upbeat Bond themes and starting things off at #8 is A-ha’s ‘The Living Daylights’. To be honest, there’s not actually that much that I can say about this song other than that I just like the melody, the beat and its energy. ‘The Living Daylights’ in general did have a pretty nice soundtrack to it, which included this and the song ‘Where Has Everybody Gone?’ by the Pretenders, which the character Necros constantly listens to on his Walkman. And as I noted a few weeks ago, the latter song was even implemented into John Barry’s score, resulting in probably one of his most energetic scores of the franchise. I do like that when Bond composers implement a Bond film’s title song into the score itself.

7. A VIEW TO A KILL- DURAN DURAN


So basically the origin of this song was a result of Duran Duran’s bassist John Taylor, who for the record is a major Bond fan, approaching series producer Albert ‘Cubby’ Broccoli at a party and asking him, while fairly drunk, ‘when was he going to get someone decent to do one of his theme songs’. And ultimately that led to Duran Duran collaborating with John Barry, resulting in one hell of a Bond theme and another one of the great energetic themes of the franchise. Obviously I’ve made it clear already that I really don’t like ‘A View to A Kill’. But to its credit, it does at least benefit from not only a pair of memorable villains, but one of the series’ best themes paired with an equally memorable title sequence.

6. LIVE AND LET DIE- PAUL MCCARTNEY AND WINGS


This was arguably the first Bond theme that I ever heard and that’s because it might just be the most popular theme in the entire franchise. For the record, this is if we’re solely talking about how many times you’re likely going to hear it on the radio compared to most of the other Bond themes. After all, this was performed by one of the Beatles. This is easily the most iconic ‘upbeat’ theme of the series. It starts off slow and then immediately launches into its speedy and bombastic refrain. Like many other Bond themes, I also liked that it was implemented into the film’s score, done here by ‘fifth Beatle’ George Martin instead of John Barry, though part of me also feels that perhaps the decision to primarily utilize the bombastic refrain wasn’t such a ‘good’ idea. Still you really can’t go wrong with this classic part of the Bond franchise’s musical history. Speaking of iconic themes…

5. GOLDFINGER- SHIRLEY BASSEY


Really, what more can be said about this song that hasn’t been said before? ‘Goldfinger’ is musical royalty as far Bond themes are concerned. It was, after all, the very first Bond theme that was sung by a musician after both ‘Dr. No’ and ‘From Russia with Love’ only featured instrumental themes. So it’s no surprise then that it’s featured on this list. It did a phenomenal job of evoking the grandeur of the franchise with its orchestrated background score and of course Bassey’s amazing performance of the song. It seems to me that when it comes to Bassey’s first two Bond themes, fans of the franchise either prefer this or ‘Diamonds Are Forever’. For the record, I do like ‘Diamonds Are Forever’ but ultimately when it comes to the one that I think of more when it comes to definitive Bond themes, the honor always goes to ‘Goldfinger’.

4. NOBODY DOES IT BETTER- CARLY SIMON


Speaking of iconic franchise tunes, ‘Nobody Does it Better’ is another Bond theme song that definitely stands as one of the most iconic themes in the entire franchise. After all, it was the second Bond theme (after ‘Live and Let Die’) to be nominated for an Academy Award for Best Song. It may not have won (that honor would end up going to the next film on this list) but it’s still a classic song that pretty much sums up the character of James Bond in a nutshell. And as noted last week, it led to one of the most perfect combinations of themes and title sequences ever.

3. SKYFALL- ADELE


Like I said earlier, I’ll admit that I was initially a little hesitant about this theme song because I thought that it would be like ‘Die Another Day’ or ‘Another Way to Die’ and come off a bit too much like a pop song and not like a real James Bond theme. Though with that said, I have liked most of Adele’s music and I guess you could say that you wouldn’t really classify her primarily as a ‘pop’ artist. But then when it was released, I was glad to see that my fears were laid to rest because holy crap this song is amazing. ‘Skyfall’ is what ‘Die Another Day’ should have been like. A soulful tune that also perfectly captures the grandeur of the franchise and one that more than deserved all of the praise that it got upon release, including an Oscar for Best Song, a Golden Globe for Best Song, and a Grammy award for ‘Best Song Written for Visual Media’.

2. THE WORLD IS NOT ENOUGH- GARBAGE


Basically ‘The World is Not Enough’ was ‘Skyfall’ 13 years before ‘Skyfall’ was ever conceived. Similar to both ‘Skyfall’ and another Brosnan-era Bond film theme, ‘GoldenEye’, this perfectly captured the spirit of the Bond franchise with its sweeping instrumentals and Garbage lead singer Shirley Manson’s crooning vocals. And would you believe that, unlike with ‘Tomorrow Never Dies’, this was a case in which the theme written by David Arnold was actually used as the film’s title theme. It seems like Arnold’s contributions as the series’ main composer from ‘Tomorrow Never Dies’ to ‘Quantum of Solace’ have been rather polarizing amongst Bond fans but if you ask me, Arnold has contributed some of the best music of the modern Bond era that I would argue stands toe to toe with some of the series’ more classic melodies. And as this title song proves, he can create one hell of a Bond theme. So it’s very much fitting that for my #1 favorite Bond theme of all-time, I’ll be going with another Bond theme that he helped create.

1. YOU KNOW MY NAME- CHRIS CORNELL


I have to admit that it was hard to pick what my favorite Bond theme of all-time was. At first I thought that it would ‘Skyfall’ but ultimately I decided to go with the first Bond theme of the Daniel Craig era; ‘You Know My Name’, performed by Soundgarden lead singer Chris Cornell, from ‘Casino Royale’. My personal favorite of the ‘fast and upbeat’ Bond themes, I particularly loved how David Arnold implemented ‘You Know My Name’ into the score of ‘Casino Royale’. It wasn’t until the end of the film when we finally heard the classic Monty Norman Bond theme so until then, Arnold utilized the song into ten tracks of the film’s score basically as a replacement theme and it works perfectly, especially in the track ‘Aston Montenegro’. It’s sort of like with Michael Giacchino’s amazing motif for the J.J. Abrams directed ‘Star Trek’ films. It may not be like anything we’ve seen from the franchise but it just works so well that we can ignore that. There’s sort of a swagger to the theme, which does fit rather well with the edgier Bond that Daniel Craig portrayed. And that is why ‘You Know My Name’ is, to date, my favorite Bond theme.


NEXT WEEK: I list my Top 10 personal Best and Worst Moments in Franchise History